is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
