I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
