New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
