Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
