This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
