How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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