He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
A+ Viking dick
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