Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
You pole danced in your parka.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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