OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
