we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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