Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
