i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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