Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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