My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize