I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
