I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize