mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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