i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
My bed smells like the plague
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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