Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
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