glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
