a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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