okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
