Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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