so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
