The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
