worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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