is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
My liver just had a heart attack.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
