kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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