i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Randomize
