Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize
