I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize