Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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