No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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