I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
