But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I think im going to throw up on grandma
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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