i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
