Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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