you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
