I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize