I'm jealous of your bromance
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
