Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(858): View more from California

i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see

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(209): View more from California

I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.

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(313): View more from Michigan

She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.

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(208): View more from Idaho

Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.

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(207): View more from Maine

He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.

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(810): View more from Michigan

There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing

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(706): View more from Georgia

Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.

(1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

classic

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(225): View more from Louisiana

So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?

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