You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
