If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
