Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize