she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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