You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
