Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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