It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
