it wasn't lemon gatorade
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
