I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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