google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
