i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Randomize
