About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Randomize
